Wednesday (1/8/2014)

Update:

Last night (Tuesday) I was able to attend the training at the Altoona Fire Department where I am the Chaplain.  It was great being around everybody.  It was all classroom training, so I just rolled along in my wheelchair from station to station.  I enjoyed the firefighting tactics the most but it was all good.

Jon, my son, came and picked me up and chauffeured me to Altoona and back.  He, and one of my other sons, Joshua, and I ate dinner at the Altoona Family Restaurant before the Fire Training.  The food was delicious and it wasn’t crowded.  So it was a busy night for me and as a result, after my head hit the pillow I didn’t have any issues sleeping soundly through the night.

Karen had to rush out this morning (Wednesday) for an early client, so I ended up making breakfast for myself.  I don’t mind the cooking, but the stove top is at an uncomfortable height and I have shied away from using it for safety’s sake.   I got it done (took 45 minutes and made a mess of the kitchen), but I missed spending the time with Karen this morning.  And I think her cooking tastes better than my own.  J

With generally sleeping better at night, I now usually take only one nap per day (and sometimes my schedule cheats me out of that one too).  With my naps, I am getting about seven to eight hours of sleep a day.  Once again, it’s a good sign that I am gaining strength and on the road to recovery. 

Seems sort of strange how much surgery can take out of you and how long it takes to getting back to feeling yourself and having any energy.  In the hospital, I was completely put under twice (once for my amputation and the other for another procedure) with only a day or two in between.  I was told that really takes it out of you.  For me, the lesson learned from this is that just because people are out of the hospital and it has been awhile since their operation, it doesn’t mean that they are back up to speed and fully recovered.  Mentally I think we tend to assume that once people are back home that everything is back to normal.  Not necessarily so.  So be patient and considerate with those fresh out of the hospital.  It is hard to image how much it zaps your energy until you’ve personally experienced it.  And take my word for it, this is a lesson you DON’T want to learn first-hand! 

After resting my sore back muscle for several days, I’ve returned to doing my exercises twice a day.  Besides the original routine I was given in the hospital, I’ve added a number of additional exercises, plus I added working my upper body with some light weight dumbbells.  It feels so good to move and stretch. 

Yesterday, Hannah and Alena came to visit me.  I am performing Hannah and Tyler’s wedding in a couple of weeks, so we were going over some details.  This will be the first time that I’ve ever performed a wedding sitting down (or in a wheelchair).  I teasingly suggested that they rent a bunch of wheelchairs and the entire bridal party process down the aisle in them.  We had fun laughing about how it would look but ultimately the bride decided to retain the more traditional “walk” down the aisle.  How boring!  Ha. Ha.

Thought for the Day:

J. Wallace Hamilton said, “Every person’s life is a diary in which he or she means to write one story and is forced to write yet another.”  Haven’t you found that to be true in your life?  Things haven’t turned out exactly the way that you have envisioned them.  Maybe this week you had plans to go somewhere that were foiled when your car didn’t start because of the cold; and everyone you called for a ride was in the same predicament.  Perhaps you couldn’t get a job in the field that your degree is in; or you cannot get a job at all and debt is burying you.  Maybe your high school sweetheart moved on and left you flatfooted; or your spouse divorced you after a messy ending to a marriage you thought would last a lifetime.  Possibly a disease or an accident drastically changed the course of your life.  Perhaps the hardest change in a life story comes when a child or loved one dies unexpectedly.  Whatever life story you envisioned and planned to write has been erased and a very different story is now being written. 

Everybody experiences this shift to one degree or another.  In high school I never imagined that I would become a pastor of a protestant evangelical church.  I was religious; but came from a very different church background.  I planned to be a cop but ended up in the military.  In the military, I was on my way to becoming a pilot but ended up having to give up that dream so that I could be stationed on the same base as my wife.  After the military, I thought I was going on staff with the Navigators and instead ended up in pastoral ministry.   I thought I would attend Dallas Theological Seminary but ended up at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School.  When it was time to move to a new church; I assumed I would be taking a church in the capitol of Missouri; instead I moved to rural Fall Creek, WI.  Recently, my left leg was amputated below the knee.  Now there is a plot twist that I didn’t see coming!!  There are hundreds and possibly thousands of ways that my story has changed from what I envisioned; but I cannot say that the changes are necessarily bad.  I can say that it is a vastly different story than I thought would be written.

I love reading.  My favorite genre is science fiction and I prefer a book series so the story goes on past one or two books.   Sometimes a book that I thought would be entertaining and captivating turns out to be a dud.  Do you know why?  Because it is so predictable!  There isn’t enough plot change or unexpected developments.  Character development and growth are important.  Guess how those things are normally introduced?  Through conflict, hardship and difficulty.  The story is moving along in just the right direction and WHAMO!  Some event happens that changes everything and the characters have to adapt to that change.  These events are rarely pleasant but they end up making the person into the character that we care about and that we want to keep reading about.

Now if we are writing the story of our lives, imagine how boring it would be if everything turned out exactly as we pictured it?  John Maxwell in his book, “The Difference Maker: Making Your Attitude Your Greatest Asset” says this, “Here is the good news: the story you write can actually be better than the one you envisioned, but you need to have the right expectations.  You have to remain flexible, and you can’t expect everything to go perfectly.”

Just reflect on every bible character you can think of.  I cannot think of a single one of them that had a “perfect” life that went exactly as planned.  I suppose that there are a few people whose lives go that way, but who would want to read about them?  We get caught up in the drama of Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers and becoming Pharaoh’s right hand man.  Every one of the disciples had pages of their life story ripped out of the book and re-written.  David formed a great kingdom but faced the death of one son and betrayal at the hands of another.  Moses was born a slave and raised as a prince of Egypt; all that was stripped away when he fled to the desert after killing an Egyptian.  He lived in the desert for decades before he returned to Egypt and set his people free.  The apostle Paul was shipwrecked, beaten, falsely accused and imprisoned.   Perhaps the greatest plot twist is that Jesus Christ, the second person of the Holy Trinity, left the splendor of heaven and came to earth, taking on human flesh and becoming one of us.  He came to rescue us from our sins but He was rejected and was killed.  Three days later He rose from the dead.  He now is in heaven as our advocate and High Priest.  He will come to earth again and establish His kingdom that will never end.  Now that is a plot twist with plenty of conflict!

Think about how heroes act when faced with adversity.  Some of the best books or films show us the common person who rises to the challenge in the face of adversity and becomes a hero.  I want to be that kind of person and I would guess that you do too.  The good news is that we get to write the story of how our character responds to difficulty and the challenges that he faces.  So write an epic tale!

Tuesday (1/7/2014)

Update:

All my staples have been removed from my amputation site.  The surgeon was pleased with how my leg has healed.  Some things have been relaxed, but I am still wheelchair bound for at least the next month.  The last thirty days of sitting has been hard and now I am entering my second month. I want to get up and move around so badly!  I’ve got to wrap my head around that it will be at least 30 more days and make a mental commitment to it.  It will be important that I am diligent with my exercises which are designed to strengthen my muscles and more importantly to maintain flexibility in my joints.  Right now I am fighting a mental battle more than a physical one.  I would guess that it is something like an athlete who blew an important play and now needs to get his head back on straight so that he can play at peak proficiency for the rest of the game.   

I can leave the brace off more during the day, but I have to sleep with the brace on to protect my stump and to prevent my leg from tightening up as it’s bent.  I can start sleeping on my side if I can get comfortable with my leg brace on.  It will be good to be off of my back once I figure out how to get comfortable on my side with the brace.  I found that it is not merely sticking a pillow between my leg but also a matter of weight and balance.  My natural leg bends as I lay on my side.  My residual limb is straight as a board (or straighter than a board if you buy at Menards  J).  So it is not as easy as it would seem.   I look forward to exploring the options.

I’ve got a number of upcoming doctor appointments (general practitioner, podiatrist, physical-medical rehab, surgeon, etc.) in the weeks ahead.  I won’t start preparing my stump for the prosthesis until after Feb 10^th.  Although I feel like a racehorse itching to run, my surgeon is holding me back to ensure that I am completely healed and ready to put the stress and strain on the amputation site.  He doesn’t want to risk breaking open my stump and set me back with another surgery and additional healing time.  So in my head I know it is the best course of action, but in my heart I desperately want to surge forward.  Oh, here is that word again: Patience. 

I obviously need to spend some time reading the bible, praying, reading my inspirational/devotional books and get my head and heart refocused and prepared for the battle that I face.  I will say that overall, I have been at peace and have not struggled too much.  But I do have to constantly watch my mental attitude and make necessary adjustments.  Most days, it is just minor adjustments—more like fine tuning or preventative maintenance.  On other days (so far, few and far between thankfully)—I need to invest more time to get myself squared away. 

We all have the ability to choose our attitude.  I deliberately have chosen to have a positive attitude and I am constantly working towards that outlook.  You can choose your attitude as well.  It might take some major effort if you have not done it in a while; but it is possible and profitable for you to do so.

Thought for the Day:

Philippians 4:8-9   Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.  Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me--put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

2 Corinthians 10:5   We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Both of these verses talk about choosing what you are focusing your thoughts upon.  Philippians tells us to choose to dwell upon the good, lovely, right and noble kind of things.  In the Corinthian passage it says we should take our thoughts captive.  In other words, put the bad ones behind bars, get them out of circulation.   Both verses deal with what you are spending time thinking about.  Both verses tell us that you can choose what you think upon.

Why does God care what you think about?  Because what you think about is part of the cycle of how you feel and how you act.  They all three go together.  Thinking is sort of the linchpin of the cycle.  Kill a bad thought in the very beginning and it short-circuits the bad feelings and bad actions.  Good thoughts tend to lead to good feelings and good actions.

Any situation is made up of both good and bad elements; it’s always a mixed bag.  What we focus upon in the situation determines whether we perceive it as good or as bad.  In my situation, I could think about the loss of my foot as a bad thing.  It will mean extra work every day.  It is harder to walk with a prosthesis than a natural leg.  So everything I do from now on will take more energy.  I am going to be limited.  Right now I am limited to a wheelchair.  There will be some things that I will never do again (or at least not without training or without a greater expenditure of energy).  Some things won’t even be worth trying.  I’ve added hours to my day for exercise, tending to my stump, maintaining my prosthesis, doctor appointments and taking longer to accomplish a simple task.  That means I have less time to do the things that I enjoy doing.  It is a pretty rotten, awful, terrible situation.  It would be natural if I focused upon those aspects to be depressed and see this all in a negative light.

On the other hand, I look at my situation and see a lot of positives.  I am out of pain for the first time in a year and a half.  I am alive and I have a future where I can enjoy life and watch my family grow.  I get to continue the things I most enjoy—preaching and teaching and encouraging others.  With work, I will be able to go for a walk, ride my motorcycle, go hunting, etc.  I’ve always wanted to exercise more and to lose weight (I am locked in to doing those things now without escape).  Although the change in my life is drastic, I have had several of my long-standing prayer requests answered as a result of my amputation.  These were things important to me that I could not make happen despite my best effort—but God used this event to bring them about.  God has used this event to challenge me personally and to make me a better pastor (I am much more sensitive to certain situations than I use to be). I have a whole lot to be thankful for.  I can see that this is an amazing, wonderful, miraculous situation.  If I focus on these aspects, I am upbeat and optimistic and can’t wait to see what new discoveries that I will make; this is a very positive event for me.

All I have to do is chose what I am going to focus upon and it changes my outlook, my attitude, and will greatly influence my actions.    It is not that I pretend that the negative things aren’t there; it is just that I choose not to define this event by the bad things.  I acknowledge that they are there, but I focus my attention on the good and positive things.

In my motorcycle safety class they taught me that if I encounter an object in the road not to focus upon it.  Instead, I was to focus on the clear path that I wanted to take around the object.  The thinking is that if you focus upon the obstacle, you naturally will drive right over it.  If you look at the clear path, you naturally tend to drive that path and miss the obstacle.

What I am suggesting is the very same thing at the mental level.  Do you want to feel happy and content?  Well then think or focus your thoughts on the things that will get you there.  If you enjoy feeling depressed and upset, then focus your thoughts on the things that lead you there.  You choose!  What are some of the negatives about your situation?  What are some of the positives about it?  Which path will you take?

You might object that it is overly simplistic and that there are other factors in play that I haven’t accounted for.  You are right; I don’t know all of your specific problems.  But I offer you the fact that this has worked in my life.  I’ve encouraged others to think along these lines and it has worked for them.  This may not answer all of your problems; but it is a good place to start and it is a healthy way to help manage your mental health.  It is your future.  Which direction do you want to head?

Monday (1/6/2014)

Update:

Sunday was very quiet.  With the weather forecast predicting dangerous wind chills, we cancelled church as a precaution.  That meant that I didn’t leave the house.  I spent time reading my bible, some devotional books and praying in the morning.  I enjoyed a hot shower, talked to my daughter Ruth on the phone, and did some more reading about being fitted for a prosthesis and learning to walk.  I watched the Packers loss to the 49er’s (sad, but what I expected).  And that was my day.

Karen was gone most of the day on Sunday and will be gone most of the day on Monday as this is Tech Week for her play, “Knights of the Round Table” that opens at the State Theatre in Eau Claire on Friday at 7:30 p.m.  So she’ll be spending lots of hours at the theatre this week.  I plan on rolling in and watching the play on Friday night.

The muscle I strained in my lower back is getting better.  I decided to stop doing my exercises and let it heal.  That seems to have been the wise choice; although I miss doing my exercises twice a day. 

Today, I go back to the surgeon in the afternoon.  He should remove the remaining staples and start me on the next “leg” of my journey—physical therapy to prepare me for my prosthesis.  I am writing this part on Sunday night and I have to say that I have that “night before the opening of deer gun season” kind of feeling.  I am excited and can hardly wait to start.  I am not certain how well I will sleep tonight in anticipation.  There are so many unknown details ahead of me; I look forward to gaining the next bit of information.  There is also a slight apprehension concerning the physical exercise.  Mentally I want to take it on and work hard so that I gain the strength and ability that I need.  At the same time I am apprehensive about whether I will be equal to the task.  Not knowing what to expect has got me all flustered.  By Monday afternoon after my doctor’s appointment, I hope I will have settled down again. 

I do feel bad that Karen will have to spend so much extra time outside loading me and my wheelchair into the car on such a bitterly cold day.  It used to be that I would do all of the outside chores and I tried to warm the vehicle up for her and knock the snow off of the car if we were going out together.  I can’t do that now.  It is surprising how grievous that is to me.  I haven’t spent much time distraught over what I am unable to do.  I really have accepted that this is who I am and how it is.  But knowing how cold my wife always is, it goes against my nature to see her out in the cold doing for me what I used to do for her.  She hasn’t complained and has gladly done whatever needed doing.  I guess I should focus on the fact that most likely it will only be for this winter—by next winter I should be able to get around more and pick up at least some of my normal outside chores. 

Saturday night, I didn’t sleep well again.  I was up for over an hour in the middle of the night.  I am glad that I didn’t have to get up for church and could catch the sleep back up.  This time I think the poor sleep was due to the sore muscle in my back.  I realized that it was time to flip the mattress because I had made a “wallow” with all the time I have spent sleeping in the same position night after night.  Karen flipped it and remade the bed, so I slept better on Sunday night. 

With all this said, I am doing well.  I am very positive about the progress that I have made and feel good about the future.  It has been just over a month since my lower left leg was amputated.  I am grateful to the Lord God for the ability to trust Him and to focus upon the positive in this adventure that I am on.  By nature, I have a sense of adventure and I like new toys, tools, etc.  Well, I am on an adventure of a lifetime.  I am sort of following a treasure map to the next clue and seeing where that leads.  And as far as new toys/tools, how many guys can say, “Wow! Look at this new leg that my wife just got me for my birthday”?

Thought for the Day:

Philippians 1:29  “For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake”

John 16:33   “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Suffering should not surprise us.  We should expect it.  God’s word tells us that we will experience it.  But for whatever reason we tend to be caught off guard when it strikes.  We may never have stated it out loud, but we kind of expect that if we are obedient in following God, only good things will happen to us.  God will protect us and bless us with a comfortable life, good health, happy family and a secure job.  With this kind of understanding, when something goes horribly wrong, we think God has failed to keep His promises.  We feel betrayed and we turn our back on God. 

The problem isn’t that God has failed us; or that God is not powerful enough; or that God doesn’t love us after all.  The problem is that we misunderstood what God has said about the effects of sin upon the world, which includes suffering, illness, disaster, and death.  We read the “good parts” of blessings and watchfulness and overlooked the “bad parts” of suffering and tribulation.

Randy Alcorn in his book, If God is Good: Why Do We Hurt? says, “If you are a Christian, God will deliver you from eternal suffering.  And He will deliver you through your present suffering, though not always from it.”

When I first dislocated my left shoulder back in the late 1970’s, Karen and I went to the doctor’s office for an evaluation.  I left his office happy and upbeat because I only heard the “good news.”  Karen, on the other hand, was much more somber because she heard the “bad news.”  I had tuned out all the talk about nerve damage, pain, the potential for more dislocations and the need for corrective surgery.  We had to compare notes to get a comprehensive and accurate picture of what the future held.  I ended up never having surgery; I’ve only fully dislocated once more in the late 1980’s but I have nerve pain and have to limit my use of my left arm to this day.

Our natural desire is to be rescued from all difficulty and pain.  It is what we want but it isn’t what we get in this life.  We have to remember that when we face suffering and tribulation it isn’t because God failed us somehow or that we have sinned and God is punishing us.  It is what it is. 

The good news is that “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5b).  God will be with us each step of the way.  We can expect that He will give us comfort and support as we rely upon Him.  While I was in the hospital facing wave after wave of discouragement and difficulties, the only thing that got me through was knowing that God was walking with me each step of the way.  He had not abandoned me.  He was there.  I sometimes questioned “why?” but I never doubted Him. 

Psalm 18:2   “The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

When you go through troubles and tribulation, hang onto the promises of God—what He has said (not what you wish He had said).  He is sufficient.  Hang onto Him and you will find that it is true.

Saturday (1/4/2014)

Update:

Final Reminder: Unless you contact me and let me know that you would like for me to continue emailing you my Updates; this is the final one you will receive.  You can always find my Updates and Thoughts on my FaceBook page or on my blog at stevenhurd.blogspot.com. 

Not much to report for the day.  1) I continue to sleep better.  I have not been waking up and remaining awake during the middle of the night for hours any more.  I still wake up about every hour or two, but I can go right back to sleep.  This is helping my energy level during the day.  2) My wife and I continue to establish a baseline for my insulin usage.  Trying to find the right dosage is somewhat of an art and you want to add additional units slowly and carefully.  3) I’ve started being more involved with the daily church work.  I am doing reading in preparation for my upcoming sermon series and beginning to outline future messages. 

I’ll tell you of an event that happened several days ago when Ruth was still at home.  Right now I am checking my blood sugars at breakfast, dinner, and before bed.  Karen and I work on this together as we are still establishing how my body reacts to certain amounts of insulin.  The last night Ruth was home, she and Cody were packing up and preparing to leave in the morning.  I became super tired and went to bed.  I knew that when Karen got home from work that she would wake me and we’d check my sugars and then give whatever insulin I needed.  When she got home I was sound asleep.  She turned on the light.  She spoke to me.  She poked and nudged me a couple of times.  I was so tired that I did not wake up.  I also had headphones on playing music while I slept.  So Karen decided that I didn’t really need to be awake, she could just take my blood sugars and give the insulin to me while I was sleeping.  She reached in under the covers to grab my hand to pull it out so she could start.  I woke up from a deep, sound sleep when someone grabbed my wrist under the covers—and I SCREAMED at the top of my lungs in terror.  J  My daughter came running down the stairs thinking something awful had just happened.  I lay in bed trying to slow my breathing down and had to smile at it all. 

You just never know what you are going to find humor in.  I figure you might as well laugh at the silly stuff that happens.  I have a friend who use to tell me all of the time, “You can’t make this stuff up…nobody would believe you.”  Truth is stranger than fiction.  Find the joy or humor in every event that you can.  It softens the blow and makes the ride more enjoyable.

Thought for the Day:

When people face difficulties or disaster, it is common for well-meaning people to offer the hurting person platitudes.   The dictionary defines Platitude in this way: “a pointless, unoriginal, or empty comment or statement made as though it was significant or helpful.”  When we don’t know what to say or how to offer comfort we often open our mouths and these words come out.

Here are some examples of platitudes: “God will never give you more than you can handle.”  “At least he didn’t die young (or didn’t suffer).”  “I guess God needed her more than you did.”  “I know exactly how you feel.”  “Don’t cry; He is in a better place.”  These platitudes don’t help the person who is hurting; and often they hurt the very person whom you are intending to comfort. 

So why do we say these things?  Normally it is because we don’t know what to say.  We see our friend or loved one hurting and we want to “fix it” and take away their pain.  We are helpless to really do so; but that doesn’t stop us from trying to say something to make them feel better.  We are desperate to help; so we speak.  The bible says to do something much different.  It says to be with the person.  Feel what they feel.  You won’t experience their trauma to the same degree; but listen to their story, feel their pain, seek to understand what they are going through and be there with them.  It is a ministry of presence.

Romans 12:15  “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”

Ecclesiastes 3:1 & 4  “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 …a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance”

If you’ve read the Book of Job you know that Job faced financial ruin, the death of all of his children, and the loss of his health.  His friends came to comfort him.  But the longer they stayed, the more they said and the less they helped.  They came to comfort but ended up condemning Job and causing him greater grief.   

If you feel compelled to say something it is best to merely say, “I am so sorry for what you are going through” and leave it at that.  That is especially true during the initial stages of grief and loss.  Even if what you said was perfectly true, it would not be received by the person and they wouldn’t find it helpful.  It is like trying to plant your garden during a Wisconsin winter.  There may come a time to speak later or you may never need to.  If the person questions God or blames Him for what happened; be quiet and let God defend Himself.  It won’t go over well if you try to defend God.  Let it go!  People often say things when they are in pain that they don’t really believe—they are merely emoting: “I’m in pain.”  For example, when my wife was in painful labor with our first born, she declared, “We are not having any more children!”  After the pain subsided, she changed her mind four more times.

I was talking with my friend, Rob, about the phrase, “God will never give you more than you can bear.”  I said to him, “God has a much higher estimation of what I can handle than I do.”  Rob said something very profound.  “That is because that phrase is wrong.  God DOES give us more than we can handle; He does it all the time, and He does it on purpose.” 

Think about it.  If God only gave us what we can deal with, well then we would take care of it all on our own.  But God chooses to give us more than we can bear.  He does that for a purpose; so that we will cry out to Him and have to rely upon Him.  When we are in over our heads, we cry for someone to save us.  When the water is smooth and the shoreline is only a few yards away; “I’ve got this, no problem.”  When the waves are crashing and we are miles from shore; “Help me! I’m dying!”

We are so self-sufficient, proud, and determined.  We strive to do everything on our own terms and in our own way.  The reality is we would be much happier and content if we learned to trust God and rely upon Him.  But trust is something we learn when we are forced to do it and then find that God came through. 

We also like to quote Romans 8:28 to hurting people:

Romans 8:28    “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them”

 (NLT).

It’s true; but truth spoken at the wrong time is useless and sometimes harmful.  There is a season to speak and there is a season to remain silent.  We also tend to use Romans 8:28 in an effort to tell people not to cry and not to grieve because “everything will be okay.”  That is not what this passage teaches.  What it teaches is that even the very worst or the most horrible thing that happens to us, no matter how awful it is—still can be used in some way by God.  Perhaps when we go through a terrible tragedy, after we’ve healed, God can use us to help others who are going through similar events.  Perhaps our faith has been strengthened as we have hung onto God during the tragedy.  It doesn’t make the event itself “good” and it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t grieve over our loss or hurt.  We just take a bit of solace knowing that despite the horror of what has happened; there is some good that may come out of it.  The good may not even happen to the person actually affected by the event.  So don’t even imply that what has happened is good to the person who is hurting.

Give them a hug.  Send them a card.  Give them a call or a visit.  Let them know that you care and that you are hurting with them and for them.  Be there for them.  That ministry of presence will mean so much more to them than any platitude that you offer.

Friday (1/3/2014)

Update:

I finally got my Testimony and Story about my amputation that I gave at church on December 15, 2013 uploaded to YouTube. If you’d like you can watch it, follow the link (or copy and paste it into your browser).  You might have to “rewind” the video a little bit when it starts (for some reason last night, the link started a minute or two into the video).  I also posted it to FaceBook and to my Blog (look in the archives under: Testimony (12/15/2013).  Here’s the link to watch it now:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAbH0AcQYXQ

As an added bonus, I also uploaded a very short video clip of me making my son, Joshua, laugh.  If you are a Dr. Who fan you should enjoy it.  If you aren’t a Dr. Who fan, take comfort in knowing that I am meeting with my therapist later this morning J 

 http://youtu.be/e0zOryRf9No

It’s my son David’s birthday today.  I usually go out and find some stupidly humorous birthday card for my kids.  This year I will have to find a Jib Jab email card to send him. That should do—they usually stupidly humorous.  I wouldn’t want my oldest son to go without on his birthday.  Happy 27^th Birthday David! You make me proud! 

Wednesday night I got the most sleep overnight since prior to my illness and amputation.  I got almost six hours of sleep without any long periods of being awake interspersed in it (most nights I am awake for 1 ½ to 2 hours in the middle of the night).  I hope that continues and gets better each and every night.  After breakfast with my wife and getting my Update and Thought written, I caught another hour’s sleep before being up for the day.  And then at about 2 p.m. I zonked out in the recliner for about an hour.  So I ended up getting eight hours of sleep for the day.  I have become “addicted” to playing worship music with my headphones on when I sleep.  It seems too quiet to sleep otherwise.  That is rather ironic because for years, I longed for quiet and had a hard time getting to sleep if there was the slightest noise or if someone was quietly moving about.  Now when I am tired, I go to bed and people are working in the kitchen across the hall from my room, or my wife is watching a DVD at high volume—and I go right to sleep.  Weird!    I slept well again last night although I woke up about 30 minutes before the alarm went off.

Yesterday, I added a few new stretching and mobility exercises to my daily routine.  Apparently I pushed one stretching exercise a bit too hard (I know which one it was).  This morning I have a sore muscle in my lower right back.  I am hoping to ease the pain out of that muscle and not make it worse.

Thought for the Day: 

One of the books that I am currently reading is “The Difference Maker: Making your Attitude Your Greatest Asset” by John Maxwell.  In the book, he reminds us that “overcoming obstacles are a normal part of life” and that we need to plan accordingly.  We all know that life isn’t easy and that we will face challenges, difficulties and obstacles as we run the race that is before us.  It does seem that some people’s lives are devoid of problems and that they don’t have a care in the world.  If we looked deep inside their world we might find out they have their share of difficulties; but even if they are devoid of obstacles at this moment, they eventually will run into some later.  No one escapes life without some obstacles.   So the big question is, what are you going to do when you hit them?  Are you going to face the challenge or are you going to just give up and quit?  Walt Emerson said, “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”  What kind of stuff are you made of?  Your attitude and determination may be the only thing that keeps you going when you slam head on into obstacles.

A few years back, our youth pastor, Jeff, and I were taking a van load full of kids to Mexico on a mission trip.  Somewhere along the way (in Arkansas or further south?), we stopped at an interstate rest stop to have a picnic lunch.  The rest stop was jammed packed with cars and people.  We found out that the interstate was closed ahead because a truck carrying some sort of hazardous waste had overturned.  They were projecting that the interstate would be closed for several more hours.  When you have 15 people crammed into a van and a ten hour drive scheduled for the day, you DON’T want to hear the word “delay.”    I remembered that we had passed an exit about a mile back.  I suggested that we try the exit and see if there was a service road or something that we could get around the blocked highway.  This was prior to GPS navigation.  Our road atlas didn’t show any connecting highways, but I knew that not everything was on the map.  So we loaded up, I drove across the median and headed back north to the exit.  We got off the interstate and there was a service road headed in the right direction, so we took it.  It wasn’t but a few miles later that the pavement ended and the gravel road began.  And then we came to a T and we had no idea which way to go.  Now we had been talking with the kids about “Listening Prayer” where you ask God to show you and then “listen” for what you think He wants you to do.  It is not an exact science, but as an experiment, I suggested that as a van, we should try it.  Let’s ask God which direction and which road we should take.  Worst case, we could backtrack and go sit at the rest stop on the interstate again.  So we prayed and the consensus was that we should go left.  We did and soon the gravel gave way to a dirt road.  At every “road” junction we stopped to pray and took whatever road we felt God wanted us to take.  I figured that pretty soon the road would dead end; but instead we hit pavement, and then a marked highway and soon we were back to the interstate south of the road block!  We stopped for gas and the attendant asked where we were headed and had we heard about the roadblock.  We told him and his buddy what we had done and they were flabbergasted.  They said something like this, “We’ve lived here all of our lives and ran these backwoods a lot hunting; but we don’t have any idea how you got through.  We didn’t know that you can get from here to there except by the interstate.  We know that we couldn’t have done what you did.” 

We learned that attempting to listen to God really works!  I would also say that it should teach all of us that just because there is an obstacle in your path, it doesn’t mean you have to give up.  Despite the circumstances, there just might just be a way around.  You won’t find out unless you try.  Don’t give up.  Don’t give in.  Keep pushing forward. 

Philippians 3:14   “I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us” (New Living Translation). 

The best athletes don’t give up and quit when they fall during a race.  They get up and begin to run again.  Although they may not be able to beat their competition and actually win the race, they can still be a winner if they don’t give up and they finish the race.  The just won the greatest test of them all.  A test of what they were made of. 

So no matter what obstacles you face, get up and keep trying.  Who knows what you may accomplish because you didn’t quit.

Thursday (1/2/2014)

Update:

I felt like being adventurous and getting out of the house on New Year’s Day.  Karen and I went to the movies.  Everything went smoothly; although we would have preferred if the handicapped seating area was further from the screen.  We are usually back row kind of people in the theater.  If that is the worst thing I can think of; it went really well.  My son, Jon, joined us and commented on how weird it was to see me out and about.  It was a nice change of pace to get out of the house and do something “normal.” 

Other than that, it was a pretty quiet day.  We could have slept in on January 1^st—I made it until 5 a.m. then couldn’t go back to sleep; my wife was able to sleep until 7:30 a.m.  Good for her!  She did a few errands in the morning while I took a nap in preparation for going out.  Then I got ready to go (exercises and dressed) and out the door at noon. After the movie, it was time to go home and hunker down again.  I went to bed fairly early. 

I noticed on the ride home how the bumps and jolts of roadways in Wisconsin during the winter didn’t hurt my stump like they did a few weeks earlier.  I think that is a sign of my leg continuing to heal.  Either that or the DOT has been out repairing the roads and filling in the potholes…we all know that isn’t happening!!! So it must be I am healing and getting stronger. 

Thought for the Day: 

C.S. Lewis wrote in ‘The Problem of Pain’, “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains; it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

It seems most people have selective hearing.  We only hear what we want to hear.  We believe what corresponds to what we want to hear.  Just think about any crime drama.  The prosecutor or the police have a suspect whom they believe did the crime.  They see all of the evidence that supports their belief and they ignore or downplay the evidence that seems to point in a different direction.  It is really hard to be truly unbiased in things that we care about. 

Here is another example, politics.  Whichever political party that you tend to side with—the other party is not only wrong, but pig-headed, untruthful, and has a hidden agenda.  If the opposing party’s candidate is in office, he can do nothing right.  While if your candidate is in office, you don’t often see that he has major flaws.  Anything that he does that you disagree with is minimized or explained away.  I think in reality either candidate is a mixed bag of the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I personally tend to vote and agree with one party over the other; but I refuse to buy into the conspiracy theory that the other party is wicked, evil, and is always pushing a hidden agenda (and “my” party is not).  Now that I’ve mixed politics and religion, what other toes can I step on? 

James 1:23-24    “Those who listen to the word but do not do what it says are like people who look at their faces in a mirror and, after looking at themselves, go away and immediately forget what they look like.”

Have you ever been shocked by looking at a picture of yourself and think to yourself, “That’s not what I look like!  What a horrible picture!”  You aren’t seeing the facts; your mind is projecting a mental image of what you think you look like.  The bible passage talks about a person who looks at himself in the mirror, notices things, but before he takes care of it, he forgets and goes on with his day.  A few years ago when I still had hair on the top of my head, I noticed as I shaved that I had a TERRIBLE case of “bed head.”  I don’t remember what happened, but I left the bathroom and never fixed my hair.  It wasn’t until I got home that night that I saw myself in a mirror and realized what I looked like at the office and while doing errands all day.  YIKES! 

When we read the bible, it shows us all kinds of flaws and blemishes that we aren’t aware that we have.  God’s purpose in showing us is so we can take care of them.  But normally we ignore them.  We may not read and ponder the bible, so we aren’t looking in the mirror.  We may only look at other people in the mirror, so we see their flaws but not our own.  God wants us to take a good look at ourselves so that we can come to Him and ask His forgiveness.

Most people think of themselves as pretty good people.  Compared to many, I am pretty good.  But am I really that good?  My friend, Randy Larson, shared this illustration with me on Sunday.  If someone thinks that God will accept them as they are because, in their eyes, they are pretty good;  ask them, “On a daily basis, since you are good, would you say you only sin (fail God’s moral law) three times a day?  Take a sheet of paper and mark three dots on it.  This sheet of paper represents the person who is looking good so far.  But three sins a day adds up to 1,095 sins a year. Start making lots of dark spots on the paper! Most people live to 70 years old, so that would add up to 76,650 in a life time.  Scribble the whole thing black.  So you think that God will accept you because you are “a pretty good person.”  Can you think of any judge who is not going to declare you are guilty if you come into court with 76,650 crimes that you’ve committed? 

The purpose of this spiritual mirror is two-fold.  The first is for you to see yourself as you really are and begin to make changes for the better in your life.  The second purpose is for you to see that no matter how hard you try, you’ll never completely clean up your life, so you need forgiveness and cleansing that only comes through faith in Jesus Christ.

So every day, look into that spiritual mirror and then do something about it.  

Wednesday (1/1/2014)

Update:

IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ:  I have been sending out daily updates in a mass mailing for the last few weeks.  Now that my crisis phase is over and the newness of my situation has faded, I realize that some of you may not wish to receive the updates by email any more.  So here is the deal:  1) Those on Face Book can find my Updates and Thoughts on my page.  Just “Like” me and you’ll see it posted.  2) My blog has every update that I posted, so you can go there and follow my journey at stevenhurd.blogspot.com as you desire.  3) Return an email message to me that lets me know you want to keep receiving the update by email and I’ll remove all the people that I don’t hear from, but I will keep sending it to you until you tell me to stop.  I appreciate your prayers and support over the last month.  You’ve helped me stay on top.  But I want to be sensitive to “Inbox Overload.”  I get too much in my inbox every day to read it all, and I end up tossing things that I signed up for without reading.  I don’t want to clutter your inbox with stuff you won’t read, so let me know.

Another first: I figured out how to take a shower without any assistance.  It takes quite a few moves of the wheelchair and the walker to get everything in position but I did it!  It is another step towards independence.  Now I don’t have to wait to take a shower based upon my wife’s schedule.  When I finally made it into the shower and settled down onto the shower stool, I realized that I had left my glasses on.  Ha! Ha!  Not any good place to put them and I wasn’t going to reverse my steps to get them out on the counter, so they got washed as well…

I went out to see my buddy, Mel, at 3 p.m. yesterday.  At 11:30 a.m. I thought I had plenty of time to eat lunch, get dressed, and even take a short power nap so that I would be fresh before Wilford picked me up.  Two phone calls, an important text message, and a visit later, I was rushing just to get dressed, never mind the nap.  Planning ahead and time management are a necessary part of my day now.  Unexpected (and often pleasant) events have to be factored in as well.  “Expect the Unexpected” is more than an ironic slogan for those with handicaps or disabilities.  That phrase does make me wonder if you can “Unexpect the Expected”?  Anyway, getting dressed can take an amazing amount of time.  Lay all the clothes out on the bed.  Put the belt through the loops on the pants BEFORE putting them on.  Laying on the bed getting dressed and then realize that I left my leg brace out in the living room and I have to go get it before putting my pants on.  So it is up, out, back, in and resume.  Whew!  Things placed slightly out of reach can be frustrating and time consuming.  Don’t underestimate the amount of effort and time it takes someone who is ill or injured just to show up! 

Last night Karen and I celebrated our anniversary and New Year’s by watching “Star Gate SG-1” episodes and then reading in bed until midnight.  Old People!!!  I don’t have any exciting plans for New Year’s Day either.  Maybe I’ll see if my bride wants to venture out and take in a movie (Hunger Games?  The Hobbit?).  That would be an adventure!

Thought for the Day:

January 1^st, 2014: it’s a new day and a brand new year.  With a blanket of white snow covering the ground, you can imagine that the slate has been wiped clean and you are starting over fresh and new.  It is like the DO OVER button on an electronic game.  Don’t like how the last game ended, then start over!  It is a day of possibilities and the realization that we are not necessarily stuck wherever we were last year.  Isn’t it funny how flipping a page on the calendar can elicit such feelings within us? 

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

God offers us that same kind of DO OVER; but not just once a year.  Any time we recognize that we have failed and our lives have become soiled, He invites us to find forgiveness and cleansing.  Confessing is merely telling God that you have failed and you ask for His forgiveness.

Why is this necessary?  Because our friendship with God becomes strained and we cannot enjoy the benefits of our relationship if sin is blocking His blessing and our access to Him.

Happy Start Over Day!  Wishing you God’s best each and every day of the new year!