Saturday, June 7, 2014

Saturday (6/7/2014)

Update:

Friday, what a day!  Got my 60 minute workout done and was working on Sunday’s message when I got a call from the church.  I had been working from home because I’ve had so much trouble with my prosthetic leg.  So I went into church to take care of an issue.  While I was there, I braved calling customer service again about my recent computer order.  Somehow when I ordered my new computer, the three peripheral items that I ordered with it were doubled (so I received two docking stations, two extra AC adapters, two docking stations).  Those three items had to be returned.  I had spent over an hour on hold earlier in the week to customer service trying to get it done; but never got through.  I finally sent an email that only got a partial response. Today when I called my wait was about 5 minutes and the first person I talked to actually helped me get the return authorization and the return shipping labels printed.  I repackaged the boxes and loaded them in my truck.  That actually was quite a sight; me carrying out two large boxes while walking with a cane.  I actually got stuck in the door at church because of the closure automatically trying to shut the door on me.  It would have made a great YouTube video!  I made it to FedEx and got the boxes shipped off.  One problem solved today! Hurrah!

I didn’t have enough time for my next errand before my 2 p.m. appointment with my prosthetist.  So I went to sit for a few minutes before my appointment.  Leah got behind with a previous client so I ended up waiting 40 minutes.  I wasn’t upset because she has gone over 30 minutes while helping me before; it takes whatever time that it does.  I am always glad they don’t give up and shove you out the door at exactly thirty minutes or one hour.  With Leah stilled tied up, Mike said that he would help me.  I had never met him before, but he seemed VERY competent; it turns out that he is one of the co-founders of the company.  Then for the next THREE HOURS he and Leah worked on fitting my prosthesis.  Talk about customer care!  I was having pain in my knee and along the fibula where the nerve crosses it.   I had tried to keep the pain at bay by adding more socks.  That didn’t work; it was only a VERY temporary reduction in pain and after a while you reach the point where you can’t add any more layers of socks because the prosthesis gets painfully tight on the leg. 

Although it was late Friday afternoon and Mike still had to drive back to Rochester, MN where the home office is located; I am very grateful that he and Leah kept at it until I was pain-free.  I went in to the office with my leg in pain and after every adjustment and tweak they made; I’d have to walk again to see if the pain returned.  Usually it only took about 10-20 steps for the pain to return then it was more evaluation and they’d go back to the lab with various parts of my leg to make the necessary adjustments, then I would try walking again until the pain returned.  Let’s just say it was a painful afternoon; but it was a profitable one too.  I learned a lot about what I could do at home to fit the prosthesis, how many socks to wear; when to put them on, etc., etc.  At the end of the three hours, I left walking without pain.

I also got to ask questions about whether I could ride a bike if my leg continues to change on a regular basis; what happens when this prosthesis can no longer be adjusted, etc.  Because not all of my weight is pushing on the pedals, I was assured that riding a bike would be no problem and a great way to exercise my legs when I am restricted in the amount of walking I can do.  I have also been concerned that at some point that they would no longer be able to adjust this prosthesis to my leg.  I thought that eventually I would have to sit in a wheelchair (a few weeks, a month) until I lost all my weight and my leg size stabilized.  I was assured that they don’t want me sitting in a wheelchair for long periods because I would lose muscle tone and lose many of the gains that I had made.  If necessary, they will make me an intermediate leg so that I can keep on walking while I lose the rest of my weight.  Whew!  That makes me happy to know.  All my medical team wants me to get the weight off, so we are all working towards that same goal.  I ended up walking more at the prosthetic lab office today testing the fit than I have been able to walk in the last week or two combined.  Now that the leg fits again, all the pain is gone.  I left the lab office very tired but happy.

Here’s a link to a 3 minute video that explains a trick I use in donning my foam liner:  


I then went to Verizon because my cell phone continues to cut out during conversations.  I had already taken it in once this week for the same issue.  They made some adjustments and told me that fixes it 6 out of 7 times.  Not my phone, I must be #7!  I was rather surprised that after asking me some questions, checking the records and looking over the phone; they decided to replace my phone for free.  So in the next day or so I should be getting a replacement phone that I can actually hear what people are saying when they talk to me!  Cool!  “Can you hear me now?”

I stopped by the Fire Department on my way home and was able to catch the Assistant Chief so he could adjust my pager.  I’ve been having trouble getting pages and if I do get them, they are filled with noisy static and I can’t understand what the dispatcher is saying.  If this fix doesn’t work, the county will be making some frequency changes in a month or two that should take care of all my pager problems; it just a matter of waiting for it to happen.  Recently, all I’ve been getting has been the tones and then static.  It’s like being woken up in the middle of the night by a screaming preschooler. “mom!  Mom!!!  MOM!!!!!” and when you go into their room, they say in a sleepy voice, “Never mind.”  Aargh!

I think that I mentioned in an earlier post that my computer at my office freaked out on me last week or so.  My tech guy got it limping along for me to use; but it is very difficult to get much done because so much remains messed up.  My new computer cannot get here fast enough! 

Let’s see: Phone, Pager, Computer.  Right now I don’t think you want me near your electronics—apparently, my very presence near them is destructive.   Ha! Ha!

I have another eye injection scheduled for Monday morning; so I am not certain whether I will have time to publish an Update on Monday.  I know that I will not be posting anything on Tuesday because my eye will need time to recover before I use the computer.

Thought for the Day:

After yesterday’s appointment at the prosthetic lab, for the first time in the last few weeks I have hope of being pain-free again.  During these past weeks, I’ve gone through a repetitive cycle: Fine one day.  Sometime on the second day, pain begins and continues until I can get into the lab.  I get a temporary fix but it lasts only about 24 hours until I am in pain again.  The problem is not the prosthetic lab—it’s me.  Between dieting and my leg changing size daily from muscle atrophy, keeping my leg fitting properly is like trying to hit a moving target while galloping along on horseback.   I only have pain when I put my weight on my left leg—it’s not like it is all-day non-stop, which makes it easier to bear.  I am averaging about two pain-free days per week.  I’ve developed an expectation that sometime during the day I will end up taking another step which leads to pain.  I walk with an expectancy of experiencing pain.  That prospect has taken some of the joy out of walking recently.

It is very strange what that does to me.  I sort flinch (at least emotionally) every time I take a step assuming that this will be “the one” that sets off the pain.  I’ve drastically reduced the amount of walking that I’ve been doing; if I limit my walking, it takes longer for the pain to return.  I’m spending more time in the wheelchair.  I drag it along with me everywhere in case I suddenly cannot walk. And the pain does happen like that.  One moment I am fine; then I take one more step and I am in pain.  I don’t go out for walks without thinking about whether there is someone to call who can come rescue me if I cannot take another step, etc.  I always have my backpack filled with socks of various sizes to try to regain a proper fit, etc.  “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of ‘pain’, I will fear no evil, for ‘my wheelchair and various socks’ are with me…they comfort me.” (a poor attempt at humor: re-written Psalm 23:4). 

Walking with the pain is not an option.  I’ve been cautioned not to even try it (one piece of medical advice that I fully plan to follow without reservation!); although I have to take a few painful steps to get to my wheelchair, etc.   If I try to push through the pain I could quickly cause an injury (bruising, wound, etc.) which could land me in a wheelchair for a few weeks while I heal.

Fortunately, I know that this painful cycle is going to end after my leg stabilizes in size.  It might be another month or two; but then everything should calm down.  But even knowing it isn’t going to last forever doesn’t mean that it doesn’t affect me.  The pain is real and the pain is happening to me right now.  Although my pain level would be considered a mere inconvenience compared to what some people experience, I can understand how people can get to the point of despairing for their own life. How can a person live like this? 

By the strength of our will we can gut out pain for a short time because we know it will end eventually.  Without an end in sight, pain can quickly become unbearable as we reach the end of our endurance.  What do we do then?  I think we have to refocus our attention upon God and eternity. 

No matter how long our life lasts, we know that it will eventually end; but as a Christian, I believe that this isn’t really the end of life, merely the end of this phase of existence.  We will live forever.  So whatever pain we suffer in this life, it will eventually end and we will receive a glorified body that never grows old, wears out, sustains injury or illness.  I’ll be whole again with two legs that work perfectly!  I am reframing my problem with pain by giving myself perspective looking forward to that day.  But that doesn’t completely take care of the present pain.

Another resource for pain is prayer. Not only can we pray for deliverance from pain; we can pray for deliverance through the pain.  God will not always remove or lessen the pain in response to our prayers.  But I feel that He will give us extra resources to endure the pain and to stand up under the test it brings to our life.  His peace and power can flood our souls and enable us during our time of need.  Living through pain can serve to strengthen our character as well as our faith and reliance upon God.  Remembering what the testing of our faith produces helps me to undergo the pain with a much healthier outlook.

James 1:2-4    “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (NIV)

The final resource for pain that we have is God Himself.  He promises to be our constant companion through all of life’s ups and downs.  His presence brings peace and comfort and strength that goes far beyond the limits of our endurance.


Pain is never easy.  Constant pain is very draining.  The fear of pain can be very paralyzing. We dig deep and seek to stand up against pain but eventually our defenses are overwhelmed and we must turn to God to be our help and sustainer.  I’m hoping to have a pain free day; but if I don’t—I know where I will turn for help. 

(Note: Lest someone misunderstand, there is nothing wrong with appropriate treatment and medication to help manage pain as well.)

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